Good on paper but…

Livvy, this is yours.

LHS and I had a talk about dancers and other sundry workers who receive compensation for their time.

He insisted that it takes a certain mindset to do that sort of stuff, because one has to toughen up to deal with the men who seek to purchase one’s services/time.

I asked him to eleborate.

He merely replied that it can’t be easy to have men treat one as a sex object that takes money, because most men are already shitty about women 1/2 the time and they really get antsy if they have to fork over money.

I replied that most men seem to love their cash more than anything else on earth. However, one can only be so grouchy if one is at the Kitty Kat Topless Lounge and Drink House, for it is a business. No one is at said Lounge just to hang out and entertain for free. The drinks have a price and so does the time and effort of Trixie, featured dancer of the night.

We meandered along that vein of convo for a bit and finally he pulled the age-old stereotype out of his hat.

Yes, that one. A girl either has to have past trauma, be really financially strapped or able to step outside of herself, for dealing with men for money is damaging to the psyche.

After a delicate cough, I asked him if he has personal experience. He replies that he did, and that sweet girl just had the ability to close herself off and get down to it, so she fared better than most. But it still affected her in small ways.

Like all women ( tongue in cheek) I then turned the convo to me. I asked him how did he feel that I am adamant about a man taking care of me, if he wants to be in my panties and intimately involved.

He said that was different than the other stuff we had been discussing. Plus, I would be a fool to let a man use and enjoy me without getting what I want in return. Why? Because a real man should look out for a woman that he calls his own.

I told him, yes I got that. But what if I were a different type of girl who did not just have a sugar daddy but went right for the dancing or escorting or straight up hooking, full speed ahead?

Not surprisingly, he said I am not ‘that way‘, it is not my nature. I may be spoiled but I am not a prostitute. Furthermore, I may be able to dance for a bit but it would be too hard for me, but that is about as far as I would go.

Because I am not “that way.”

I asked if he really believed that. Or was he just being anti-establishment and working on his “lover not a fighter” street cred.

He sounded puzzled but replied in the affirmative. He stood by his premise.

I sighed.

And we had the conversation again, with different wording. Same conclusions.

Oh my goodness.

{He is right, I am not that way. I am not sucking and slurping and twirling and twisting and doing whatever the heck a man asks me to do, whenever he asks it, because he gives me stuff. I mean, yeah, that is a bold attitude but if he doesn’t like it, there is another girl to be found.

I do not need my adoring lovers, I just will not tolerate their presence under false pretenses. I do not see the point in lying, acting other than how I feel. I know a bunch of woman who get a lot for not much activity. Some are wives and others are girlfriends who refuse to budge away from their baseline.

My baseline is that I will be respected. At times to maintain my respect, “no” has to be heard.

I do not feel superior to any woman- be she like me or not. I do feel that I have to live with myself and if I violate my standards, then what type of woman am I? }