Good on paper but…

Was busy yesterday, and since CG is not tied up on th road, WTFW is not too bad.

Well, yeah, it is, but I was trying to be nice.

I spoke to a friend, she works in med field. She had to drop off kids to a coworker’s place. A nurse who makes about 35.00 hourly, not including her delicious overtime. (The kids are hers, they needed ride from school.)

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Would love to write more watching VH1 Classic show about the history of metal.

Going to nightdream, after that.

More later….

LHS wants somthing that I have never done for anyone or considered. He has been deceived and mislead, so of course he was a form proof of my devotion.

He wants me to chase him a bit, tease him, need him, cling just a tad.

Something that is not a part of my personality. Things that I think are not real, only self-centered illusions, only seving to trick and manipulate a lover into submission.

I do really think that. For love is giving, freeing, not restrictive.

Love is not controlling, whiny, stifling.

But that is my take, my gut reaction.

Therefore, if I act in ways contrary to my soul,just to make LHS feel that he truly matters, then I am false.

My soul in inherently true.

He needs to embrace that. If not….

I will miss him, that I quietly, ferociously admit.

**** ***** ***** *****

In case you forgot or are sipping on strong alcoholic drinks this weekend, a proof is an argument intended to persuade others of the correct nature of a statement-namely, that the argument is true.

This basically is used for pure math and corresponding symbolic logic but…logic allows for an extension of it past pure numbers into words-philosophical logic.

My fav is the classic: modus tollendo ponens (mode which, by denying, affirms) or as it is commonly known, disjunctive syllogism.

P or Q

Not P

There fore, Q

Everyone has a reason for writing, talking, speaking. It may be mundane or profound.

In my case, it is to hang on to the last scraps of privacy. Yes, blogging is private.

Going to the grocery with my shopper’s card tags my preferences and desire for organic veggies.

Using a credit or debit card records where and when and what.

Pulling cash out the ATM or via the hassled teller at the  bank is a date/time stamp.

There are always eyes upon me, even if they are disinterested, just skimming over me because I belong.

An honest revelation to most people of what I feel will cause me to be seen in the wrong way.

In a world of transperency, interruptions, judgements, opinions, and so forth, I need to express my thoughts in a vacuum.

i do not need my words thrown back at me, dissected, analyzed.

I just need them to be as they are.

Letters strung together to make words, that create sentences that convey ideas.

Words are the last place I have to hide.

Quick note, 2 points:

1. A man I recently met asked if I watched porn.

I replied in the negative.

He seemed surprised. I explained that life is fractured enough, I like my sex holistic. I think that porn is not good or bad, just it is what it is and I step aside of that fray.

He can watch it, but with some other woman.

There has to be a more imaginative way to try and turn me on.

2. A guy who thinks he likes me made one comment two many about a woman’s hotness.

Yes, beauty is beauty. Admire it. But it is gauche to expect me (if he wants to screw me) to chit-chat about the hotness factor of said woman passing by.Or on TV, movie, whatnot. Admiration yes, but ogling, no.

He is Stateside, so he may forget his manners. In the bullpit we all wallow through daily, some of us can’t shuck our battle gear and mentality outside the door.

I do not like spitting in the street, being rude to strangers or treating me like I am one’s “homie.”

Shudder and frown,

Aneris

À toucher l’ensemble. À déguster sur lui toutes…de se sentir lui toutes sur moi…oui.

My Dad told me he was going to make sure I had my own money, for things were changing and he doubted that i would be able to find a man to take care of me and our kids.( We are old school, we believe in marriage and a baby. Not just the baby.)

He understands the need for the sexual revolution but he said the aftereffects would be rough on the traditional kind of woman. Oh yeah.

I support all kinds of lifestyles but I would like to see the survival of the hunted beast-married to a man, and having the ability to be cared for as the caretaker of the home, him, and the babies.

It takes two incomes at times but often, it is the attitude that it is somehow weak of a man to care for his woman, that bugs me. That a real woman will work a 20 hour day, just because she can.

Umm, no. If it is about choice, then why is it so hard to have that one? It is not just the financial economy-it is the economy of the mind that reduces everyone to the value of what they can produce in dollars. Men are dollars, women are dollars with asses and tits to boot-there is nothing but that.

I know a few old-school dudes that feel like your wife is precious (not just your fellow dollar collector.) They are close to extinction, as well.

One told me that he does have to go off on some guys he knows periodically, who insist that he is deluded or wrong for wanting his wife to stay home with the kids. She can work, but he wants her to work on the kids. Like he said, he can get another job but he can’t just replace his kids and if they are screwed up, he is going to blame himself, not anyone else.

Now, I maybe a bluestocking, a smart-ass, a sexy bookworm and a few other things, but I do think that kids are important. A woman can work if she wants but she should not be seen as a milestone, if she is doing her job at home.

Yes, I have been forced to defend the rights of stay-at-home Moms to strangers in my daily rounds at times., just as I defend hookers, hippies, a few conservatives and stoners. Takes all kinds to make a strong society.

I knew as a teen that it was be rough, for the popular songs changed. Used to be a time when a player was glad to keep his woman looking good and sharp. Now even the criminals expect the gf’s, baby mommas, wives and so on to be out the door by 8a.m. to get to her job. That was the prime reason for wanting a “baller”, to get spoiled.

We are pervaded with misogyny in our world, along with hopelessness, cynicism and gold diggers. Yes some women are shiny-eyed , heartless gold diggers. (God loves them, too, before you say something mean.)

With this continued sexual revolution, I would like to see a economical parity for women, as well as the chance to be just as raunchy and hot as men are acting.

Until then I thank my Dad for not only providing me with money but the means (education, a brain ) and attitude ( wily, willing to work) to be able to make some for myself.

Kisses to you, Dad.

2nd in the series. Start here for the post I am expanding.

When I grabbed the RS out of my mailbox, I glanced at it and threw it on the table. I did not get to it until 3 days later.

I read the Nici article with interest, for it signaled to me that it really is no end to what women have to do.

As I have mentioned before it is not enough to fulfill your role-wife, girlfriend, dancer, escort, sugar baby, hooker, erotic massage therapist, and all categories not mentioned.

One must be hotter, sexier, more exotic than that. It helps to be a porn star, I suppose, to really reel in a big whale.

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*One in a series on this topic*

Inevitable.

Seen the latest edition of RS1052? Did you check out the innocuous story about a sweet girl who has grasped the bull by the horns and rode it to glory?

Written neatly by Vanessa Grigoriadis, we meet a madam of sorts. Seems that the enterprising Nici (Michelle Braun) decided to up the ante to get her share of the marketplace. It was not enough to provide an escort service, for the men seem jaded and immune to standard flesh.

They needed a boost–porn star escort flesh. Ahhh! Eureka!

I am sure you guys will read (or have read it), so I will just point out what stuck in my head:

“But she was always looking for richer men to book her girls, so she could attract a better class of women and make connections to still wealthier men.” p.51

“Not young, drug-addled nobodies like the girl who blew Eliot Spitzer but the pinnacle of L.A. beauty, women who represented the gold standard in the world of international escorting…” p. 52

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Have you guys paid any attention to the e-harmony dating site commercials?

Since I am slightly shallow and pretty cute, I will say it: those people are kinda homely. Some are plain. None are hot, dazzling, sexy, beautiful or any of those descriptives that cause the mind to water.

I am sure that the lens of love makes a person beautiful, for one sees their goodness. We know that. Hell, when someone works on my nerves, they had better be pleasant on the eyes, so that they have at least one redeeming factor.

But for a site that runs on and on about the prefect match and true love, they surely have forgotten that some of us have eyes.

Please reject me, for if I have to be stuck with some of those unappetizing men, I am glad to be in the “out” group or riding the short bus.

BTW, if you have time, please check on the Bush cartoon show on Comedy Central. Add your voice to the massive echo of laughter across the country at 10:30 EST